Just Put Your Arms Around Me

Just Put Your Arms Around Me

Pan stumbled unsteadily through the front door. Her mind was a dizzy swirl of memories she couldn't quite understand. She leant back against the wall and breathed sharply. What had happened to her? It didn't fit! Everything was so jumbled! She tried to remember exactly what had happened.

The pub was alive with happy chatter. Everywhere, people were socializing, most of them too drunk to make proper conversation. But they babbled incoherently to each other. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves. It was the weekend - why not? The pub had a smoky atmosphere from young and old smoking cigarette after cigarette, clouding the air. She sat at the bar. Alone. She stirred the cheap plastic spoon around in the bottom of the glass, clinking the ice cubes together. Everyone seemed to have somebody…except her. She closed her eyes briefly. When she opened them, a man stood there. He smiled shyly at her. "Is this bar stool taken?" he asked meekly. Pan couldn't help but smile. She motioned for him to sit down. The man glanced shyly at her. "I'm Brad, by the way." He said in a friendly tone. He held out his hand for her to shake. Pan smiled, and brushed a strand of hair from her face.

"I'm Pan." she said, and shook his hand. They both burst into nervous giggles. Brad was well built and looked like he worked out, but he wasn't at all full of himself. She and Brad talked for ages, he had a brilliant sense of humor!

He smiled at his new friend. "Let me buy you a drink." He said. "I insist." Pan smiled back at him.

"Okay." She said. He watched her as he drank her drink and grinned at her. What happened next was a blur. Bits came back to her in strange flashes. His voice, his voice sounded hollow, his hot breath on her neck. The dark, dampness of the alleyway, his cold hands ripping at her clothes. Her helpless desperation as he took her. Then he left her, on the stone cold pavement, confused and alone.

Pan couldn't remember it all. She had pulled herself up, smelling the damp, feeling disconcerted and dizzy. She didn't know how long she had been laid there, but she had got to her feet, and headed home. She rushed upstairs to her room, and shut the door. She flung herself onto her bed, and cried. As she lay, she could see the marks on her wrist, deep and sharp. She had felt so weak! It was like it wasn't even her laid in that alley, it had felt like someone else’s body. She remembered Brad’s words in the bar. "Let me buy you a drink…" Pan pounded her fists against the bed in frustration. The drink! He must have put something in it! Damn… she thought as hot tears fell down her face. She had heard of it happening to other people, but she never thought it would happen to her! She clutched her abdomen as a searing pain shot through it. She ached all over. She opened her eyes as she endured the pain. She looked out the window into the night sky. I can't believe I trusted him… she thought angrily. The tears and exhaustion eventually brought a dreamless sleep.

Gohan knocked on her door early the next day. "Pan, honey? Breakfast." He called. Pan awoke to hear his footsteps down the stairs of the house. She stirred, for a moment, her mind blank. Then it hit her in a wave. The empty spaces from last night began to be filled in. She remembered everything. The numbness she had felt a while after the drink, the bright lights, and the jumbled noises of the bar growing fainter as she was led away. It was like she had no control, she could see him, feel him tear at her clothes, but she couldn't scream, couldn't fight. Her arms and legs felt limp as he laid over her, his heavy body pressing down on hers…

Pan gasped with the full realization. I was raped… She lay, dry-eyed while she registered the horrible truth. She slowly pulled herself up. She had bloodstains on the hem of her dress, and her inner thighs had rough scratches on them. She rose shakily, and headed for the bathroom. She went down for breakfast after she had scrubbed herself clean. But, it hadn't helped. She still felt dirty. She sat down and ate her breakfast as normally as she could. Her father looked at her suspiciously.

"Pan…are you okay? You're not ill, are you?" he questioned with concern. Pan attempted to smile at him.

"No, I'm just a little tired from last night, that’s all." She said with a happy tone. Gohan smiled back, and they resumed eating.

Pan went through the day as though nothing had happened, although it was tearing her up into pieces inside. She smiled at everyone, and they took her for her normal self. She was a good actress, she never gave a hint that something wasn't right. She wanted so much to tell someone, but she felt ashamed. She couldn't bear for them to know how stupid she'd been, how naive. Most of all, she was scared. But, her pride wouldn't allow fear.

Evening came, the sun bled across the sky to set in the west. Pan found herself outside the Capsule Corporation. It was then she saw him. He was sat on the lawn, his steady eyes locked on the horizon as if in deep thought. The warm breeze gently lifted the lavender strands of his hair from his face. Pan couldn't help but gasp. He was beautiful. He almost looked like a painting, untouchable. "Trunks…" she said softly, almost in a whisper. He turned to her, resting his deep blue eyes on her. Pan still stood there, as he turned his gaze back to the setting sun. She went to sit beside him, relishing in just being close to him. She watched his chest move in and out slowly as he breathed. The loneliness came upon her again. She couldn't help being scared, of what was in front of her, of what she loved. She faced him, trembling with emotion. He looked at her again, his expression blank. She needed him, needed comfort and reassurance. She needed him to be there. She leaned in towards him, in a daze, and pressed her lips on his. Trunks didn't react, he froze, not responding to her advances. Shaking, Pan pulled away, her fist clenched with shame. She didn't dare to look him in the face. He didn't care…

"Pan…I don't…" Trunks said. Pan understood. He didn't want her… Why should he? She was used… Trunks got up slowly, and flew into the newly darkened sky. Pan got up from the damp grass, and walked inside the Capsule Corp.

Pan wandered through the Corp, and she heard a commotion from down the hall.

"I've had it Vegeta! You've gone too far this time!" shouted Bulma loudly.

"Damn it woman! Why must you always chuck me out of my own room!" Vegeta protested.

"Fine then!" Bulma yelled back. "I'll stay with Goku and Chi-Chi then! Keep the damn bedroom to yourself, you materialistic git!" Pan heard footsteps hurrying down the elaborate stairs of the Capsule house. "And, for your information, I'm not ugly!!!" she finished off defiantly.

"Woman, I shall be expecting breakfast tomorrow morning." Vegeta demanded down the stairs.

"Grrrrrrr! I'll be at Chi-Chi’s house! Are you deaf????" she yelled back at him.

"You'll be back in plenty of time, when that baka and his wife throw you out for breaking every mirror they own!" finished Vegeta. Pan could almost visualize his smirk. The door slammed, making the windows tremble. Pan stood against the wall. She felt dejected. The harsh words exchanged between Vegeta and Bulma had only brought her experience with Trunks to the front of her mind again. She felt lonely beyond belief. She had gone to Trunks for support, for reassurance, and most of all, love. But he saw her as a child still, he always will, Pan realized with utter dismay. She had to fight the tears that welled up in her dark eyes. She felt worthless, Trunks didn't love her, and… She couldn't even bear to think about it. Why would anyone want her? She was dirty, cheap, used…

Vegeta strode down the hallway, stopping to look at Pan. She didn't acknowledge him at all.

"Brat…" he said. Pan looked up at him, and he almost took a step backward. Her expression was one of total desolation. She turned away, she couldn't bear to be looked at by a male. He took her by the shoulders. "What’s the matter with you?" he asked gruffly. Pan sniffled, and broke into sobs. Vegeta let her cry for a few moments, before pulling her into a stiff hug. She sobbed onto his armored shoulder, overcome with rejection. Vegeta could feel each wrench of her body, the effort of each sob. He ran his hand through her hair without realizing it. He could smell her, the scent all Saiyan women shared. Bulma wore so much expensive perfume, but it was nothing compared to this. Pan slowly broke away from his restrained embrace, her small hand lying on his chest. Vegeta watched her carefully. She was in heat, of that there was little doubt. Vegeta could recognize the signs. He could also tell that she was hiding something, burying something deep in her mind. But, at this time, he was curious of her actions.

Pan pressed her hand lightly over the Saiyan's chest. She smiled slightly, she could feel his heart beat quickening through his chest. Vegeta raised his eyes slightly, in surprise. This was Saiyan attraction taking place. Pan didn't look in his face, but he watched her fingers as they traveled down his chest. She pressed up against him with her chest, and purred instinctively in his ear. Vegeta shuddered, but watched her movements with growing interest. She began to make small kisses down his neck. He shivered and pulled her off him. She looked at him searchingly. He was so dark, that she couldn't help but feel afraid. He smirked and pushed her against the wall instead. She smiled as he looked at her with a face full of lust at the signals she was giving out.

"You better know what you're getting yourself into, brat." He snapped, as he drew her close.

Pan awoke in a large double bed. The cream satin sheets were tangled and twisted around her slender body. The sun shone through the slits in the blinds, warming her bare skin. She sat herself up in the luxurious bed, Vegeta and Bulma’s bed… Pan felt sick. What had she done? She punched the mattress in frustration. Damn! She was so mixed up! She felt tearful again, but the tears wouldn't fall. She was blank, emotionless. She rose, still entangled in the bed covers, and walked across the cream plush carpet to the adjoining bathroom. She forced herself to look in the mirror. She felt disgusted with herself. She looked at all the marks on her body from the nights’ activities. She ran her hand over the scratches and bruises. Vegeta had been rough. But that’s how she had wanted it to be, no emotion, just instinct. The one mark she knew she didn't have was the Saiyan mating mark. The encounter hadn't been personal enough for that. Both of them were acting on frustration, in Vegeta’s case she wasn't entirely sure what that might be. But Bulma was human, no matter how much humans look like Saiyans, they are an entirely different race. Vegeta had to cope with rejection too, for Bulma threw him out many times before to sleep elsewhere. And Bulma had no conception of Saiyan rituals, Vegeta often compromised and held back much of his true self.

But no matter how the encounter between him and Pan may have been justified, Pan kept on punishing herself. She had deserved the rough treatment, the lack of feeling. She wandered back into the bedroom in a daze. She released the satin cocoon of sheets, and it rustled daintily at her feet. She picked up her trousers and top, and slid them straight on. She tried not to think of the effect this one night would have on her family and friends. She hesitated for a second in the bedroom, taking in the atmosphere now it was day, and there were no more uncertainties in the dark. The day seemed to wash away the sins of the room with its warming, forgiving light. Pan opened the window overlooking the Capsule lawns. The fresh air of the new day hit her, and she flew out of the window in the direction of home.

Despite her fears, Pan was able to face her family. She blanked the incident from her mind, as if it never took place. But the marks covering her body said otherwise. She was sparing with Goten that afternoon, outside on the green lawns of the Capsule Corp. Vegeta was even there, but they never showed any signs of what had happened. It was as if he were embarrassed of the fact that he let his Saiyan instincts take over him. He acted indifferently towards her, for which she was almost thankful for. She treated him unresponsively too. Pan tried to put all her concentration into fighting Goten, but her mind was elsewhere, and he could tell.

"Come on Pan! You're not even watching me!" Goten complained. Pan landed from the battle onto the lawn. Goten sighed and flew down too. Pan was having trouble keeping her memories repressed sufficiently enough for her to get on with her life. She wanted her family’s help, support and reassurance.

Bulma threw open the front door of the Capsule Corp. They all looked at her murderous expression. She ignored everyone and went straight for Vegeta. He turned and they faced each other. Bulma held up a pair of black lacy panties in the afternoon sun. She stared at him in the face.

"Explain why these were in our bed?" she hissed, waving them in front of Vegeta. Vegeta never gave her a reaction, which maddened Bulma more.

"Aren't they yours?" asked Goku shyly. Bulma glared daggers at him.

"NO! That’s why I'm UPSET." She shot at him. Goku backed off. "Vegeta, tell me, please! I know you could never admit out loud that you loved me, but this…" Tears began to well up in her eyes, but she still felt the incredible anger, burning her up inside.

Pan took a sidelong glance at the calm Vegeta, and she also stood indifferently. Videl leaned in and looked closer at the underwear. She gasped in utter shock and stared straight at Pan. Bulma noticed this and followed Videl’s horrified gaze. She looked at Pan, and Pan turned her head away, avoiding eye contact.

"You whore!" Bulma screamed maniacally at Pan. Everyone caught up with the situation, and gaped in horror at Pan.

"What the hell Bulma! You can't just accuse Pan like that! It’s ridiculous! Gohan yelled at Bulma, in Pan’s defense. Videl put her hand on her husbands’ shoulder, momentarily startling him.

"Gohan, that’s Pan’s underwear." Videl said quietly. Gohan looked at his daughter in disbelief.

Bulma turned on Vegeta. "WELL????" she demanded.

Vegeta crossed his arms across his chest. "Yes, I mated with Gohan’s brat." He said indifferently. Gohan powered up instantly.

"Pan! How could you?"

Trunks leapt in. "That’s sick! If this is your twisted way of getting back at me for rejecting you..!" Trunks verbally attacked Pan. Bulma tried to attack Pan, but she was held back by Trunks. "She’s not worth it." Trunks spat, glaring at Pan. Pan endured the harsh words that came from the same lips that she had often wished were on hers. She mentally detached herself from all emotions. She didn't attempt to defend herself.

"You Slut! You Whore!" Bulma screeched at Pan. Pan didn't react, she just stood there. Vegeta had heard enough. He powered up and flew off, only leaving an indication of a vapor trail. Goku screamed as he powered up, and he took off to follow the other Saiyan.

Gohan stepped towards his daughter, and slapped her across the face. Pan’s head didn't move for a few seconds, her hair lying across her face.

"I'm disgusted with you." snarled Gohan coldly. Pan slowly turned her head towards her fathers’, holding her red cheek. She stared straight into her father’s eyes, then took of into the bright sky. Pan flew as far and as fast as she could. Once she was racing away at high speeds through the sky, she let the tears fall openly. She choked and spluttered with the spasms of uncontrollable sobs that overtook her small body. She placed a hand on her stomach as she flew blindly, to feel the small ki beginning to grow there.

She walked along the streets until it grew dark. She was cold, and by herself. Her family had rejected her…her family. She had never seen her father look at her like that before. He had never struck her… She reached a hand up to her tender cheek. As she walked, she could sense someone behind her. She swung around in fighting stance. It was a girl.

"Hey! I didn't do anything…please." The girl said, afraid. Pan relaxed. She looked more closely at the girl. She looked about her age, and was dressed up.

"What are you doing out here?" asked Pan softly.

The girl turned away from Pan to scan the road. "Working." She said quietly. Pan realized. The girl paced a couple of steps. She looked at Pan. "What’s your deal, anyway?" she asked. "No one walks around these streets at night for fun."

Pan closed her eyes, and shuddered slightly. She had no home anymore. Not since…

The girl appeared at her side. "That bad, huh?" she said with sympathy. Pan didn't answer. "Look, do you have anywhere to stay tonight? I've got a place…it’s not much, but, it’s better than staying out here." The girl glanced around her. "It’s not exactly safe."

Pan looked at the girl. She didn't have a better option…

They walked along a run down hallway. It was terrible, she could hear arguing and something being broken. The paint was peeling on the walls, and the wooden floor was covered in dust. The girl stopped in front of a blue door. She glanced at Pan as she unlocked it. "Well, this is it…" They walked in on a bare room. There was an old double bed, and a couch that looked like it was going to fall to pieces. "Sorry for the mess." The girl said apologetically. Pan stood there, while the girl took two sodas out of a small bedside fridge. She handed one to Pan, and motioned for her to sit down. Pan sat, holding the open soda in her hands. "So, you still haven't told me what you were doing roaming the streets." The girl said. "I'm Lucy, by the way." Pan looked up at her.

"Pan." She told her. Lucy smiled. "Now, do you wanna tell me why you were wandering?"

Pan told Lucy the story of what had happened. She changed some of the parts, especially the Saiyan thing. "And I guess I've got nowhere to go." Pan finished.

Lucy looked sympathetic. "A lot of us have backgrounds like that. That’s why I'm here, anyway. I didn't choose to live like this…but it pays the rent. Until I sort myself out."

Pan knew what she was talking about, why she was stood on that street corner. Pan brushed her hand lightly over her belly. She was going to have to support a baby. She looked at Lucy. "What do you think…of it, I mean." She asked, embarrassed. Lucy looked surprised.

"Like I said, it pays the rent. Why…do you wanna try it?" she asked. Pan nodded. If she was going to stay here, she would need to help out. And, she would have to save up for when the baby arrived.

"Please? Could you help me?" Pan asked. Lucy smiled and gave her friend a hug.

They went out later on that night. Pan was terrified, but Lucy seemed so calm. Pan had on one of Lucy’s dresses, and she felt self-conscious. It wasn't long before a car pulled up to them. The windscreen rolled down, and a man looked out with a grin. "How much?" he said. Pan told him, and with one last glance at Lucy, got in the car.

Pan was dropped off afterwards, and Pan received her first payment. Lucy was waiting for her. She walked over. She looked at Pan with concern. "Are you okay?" she asked. Pan tried to smile.

"Sure." She replied. But she wasn't. She crumbled the bills slightly in her hand. Payment, for what she had just done. She had cried while it had happened. There was no feeling. It was a job. But, there was no turning back now. She had gone through with it. She followed Lucy slowly, back to the apartment.

It had been two months since Pan’s disappearance. Although they missed her presence, they couldn't forgive Pan for what she had done. It had however brought them all closer together. They spent a lot of time with each other, and they decide to go out one night, dragged along by the younger of them to a new club in Satan City.

They entered the bright club. It shone various colors, and shapes moved in a blur. It was filled with an excitement, a flurry. People were everywhere, dancing wildly, crushed together and leaping about. The older adults felt extremely nervous of the youthful atmosphere. Trunks, Bra and Goten looked in awe at the crowds of people dancing.

The crowds parted slightly, and more dancers emerged. In the middle danced a beautiful dark haired girl. She was dancing with a young man very closely.

"Pan?" Gohan stuttered, but not heard over the loud, fast-beat music.

She danced closer, her hips swinging suggestively. She pressed her body close to the male, and it was obvious he was enjoying it. She turned around and pressed her back to him, moving her body against him just slowly enough to tease. He moved with her, his hands held onto her sides, holding her against him. She turned her head slightly, smirking, and raised her arms above her head.

Goku looked puzzled. "That’s dancing?" he inquired, puzzled.

Gohan snarled. "No, that’s something entirely different."

Bra tried to push them along. "So? Remember what she did to all of us?" Bra protested.

Trunks looked at Pan in disgust. "Slut." He said quietly, but meaningfully. She was moving her hips sensually. Trunks couldn't help but feel aroused, but the feeling was mixed with anger.

Bulma seethed at everyone watching Pan. "Ok, move it along!" There’s certainly nothing to see here!" The group reluctantly moved. Gohan took the longest, as he watched Pan whisper in the young, hot-blooded males’ ear, then lead him outside.

They fell out the club later, onto the damp street, laughing. They had relaxed and started to enjoy themselves immensely. The sky was black, with wisps of gray clouds. It had been raining, and the wind was icy and unpleasantly cold.

A black sporty car pulled up across the car with a screech, its headlights piercing the drizzly atmosphere. It stopped under a pale shining streetlight. To their surprise, Pan got out of it, slamming the door behind her. She was wearing the same outfit she had worn in the club, a silver two piece top and skirt, with black leather boots. She leaned over to talk through the wound down window.

"I want my money, jerk." She seethed. She reached and pulled the crumbled bills from the man’s hand. There was a screech of tires on tarmac as the car showily sped away.

Pan winced, and tried to ignore the lump in her throat. I will not cry... She choked back a sob. He had been less than gentle with her, she thought. She ran her finger over her bleeding lip and frowned sullenly. But she had deserved it, after what she had done to everyone.

She started walking briskly, stuffing the now damp green bills into a small shoulder purse. She was cold, and she put her arms around her middle to keep her bare midriff warm.

She sighed, refusing to weep. What would she do when she developed a baby bump? What then? How would she get work? She thought miserably. She happened to glance over the other side of the road, and stared in horror. The others watched her, also shocked.

Gohan winced with realization. His only daughter was selling herself on the streets? No one could quite grasp the full extent of what they had just witnessed. Pan was staring straight at them, her face scared and lonely. Her hair was tousled, and her lip was bloody. Her eyes looked hollow and red rimmed.

Pan started to run away, her thin heels clicking a hollow sound on the pavement. She was filled with humiliation, at having them see what she had been reduced to. With a burst of ki, she took off into the cold night sky.

Pan landed at the apartment. She ran in, and began stuffing her things into a small rucksack. Lucy walked in. "Pan?" she asked. "What’s going on?"

Pan flung her bag over her shoulders. She went up to Lucy. "I'm sorry, but I have to go." She explained with sorrow. "I've got the money I need, I can get a place of my own, a job…"

Lucy looked at Pan, upset. "If that’s what you need to do…"" she said, trying to fake cheerfulness. "I'll miss you, you know…" she said quietly, blinking back tears. Pan hugged her friend tightly.

"Lucy, promise me this. Promise me you'll get away too." She pleaded. "You could, you could make something of yourself."

Lucy smiled slightly. "You think so?" she asked uncertainly. Pan nodded.

"Yep, you could." She repeated. They hugged again. Pan sniffled back tears too. "I'll miss you too." She said. "If it wasn't for you, I don't know where I'd be now."

They hugged one last time before Pan was on her way. She was going to give herself a fresh start. She walked along the familiar street, and not caring who saw, leapt into the air.

Pan stood on the windy hilltop. The wind sighed around her. She surveyed the familiar surroundings. She smiled slightly, overcome with happier memories she had had here. She was not really sure what had brought her here again, it had been just about five years since she was here last. In that time she had grown, not just in height, but in person. She had survived on her own in those years. She breathed a big sigh. No, she really didn't know what pulled her back again, to face the past she had tried so hard to put behind her. Her senses were on full alert on the bright crisp morning. Every breath she took she seemed to become more alive. She homed in with her senses, on an area full of high powered ki’s. The Budoukai. It was held every year, and this year she was going to be a part of it. She flew off in the direction of the tournament.

She landed next to the arena. No one was startled by her flying, many other contestants could. She pushed her way through the crowd to the booth. She waited in line for a couple of minutes. "Next please! Name?" the man asked.

"Son Pan." She replied, paying her entrance fee. She was given a number, and they took a picture of her for the scoreboard. She glanced around, trying to remember where the changing rooms were. Suddenly, familiar faces appeared in the crowd. Pan froze to the spot as her family and their friends walked through the crowd. They looked the same, yet so different. Pan stood, staring at them. They were laughing, and they looked all the more like a family. She regained control of herself, and ducked into the crowd of people. Vegeta sensed a familiar, but forgotten ki. The others didn't seem to notice. Vegeta quietly slunk of in the direction of the ki.

Pan walked along quickly, occasionally bumping into people walking the opposite way. Vegeta followed close behind. Pan almost ran through the mass of people, and she accidentally knocked into a man. She fell on the floor. She winced, closing her eyes. When she opened them, she saw a hand in front of her. She gratefully held on to it, and pulled herself up. She looked up at the man with a smile. "Thanks…" she began, until she looked him in the face. She gasped in horror. Vegeta stopped a short distance off, watching the two.

"Are you okay lady?" The man slurred. Pan stepped back and tried to pull her hand away.

"You…you…" she stuttered.

"Fancy seeing you here." He said casually. "I never had the chance to say goodbye at the bar."

"What?" Pan said in disbelief.

"Well, you know, you had to run off." He explained. "You had a meeting, or something." He said, smiling pleasantly.

Pan was speechless. "I know what you did!" she snarled. "I remember everything!"

Brads’ expression changed slightly. "Gee, that’s too bad. It mustn't have had as much of an effect on you." He added slyly. "But it was enough."

Pan struggled in his grip. Brad let go of her hand, laughing. She stumbled before running away in the opposite direction. She pushed her way back through the crowd. "We'll have to meet up again, soon!" She heard. Suddenly, a hand grabbed her wrist, and pulled her into a changing room. Pan struggled in terror.

"Let me go!" she said, kicking out.

"Brat! Stop it!" came a familiar voice. Pan stopped struggling in surprise. She glanced at him.

"Vegeta?" she asked with uncertainty, though she knew it was him.

"You seemed in a hurry." He said, still holding onto her wrists. "It was as though you were running from something." Pan didn't answer. "It must be bad to make a Saiyan run."

Pan looked at him. Had he heard? Vegeta noted her expression. He now knew for sure.

Pan tried to break away from Vegeta’s grip, but he held her tight. "You never told me you were raped brat." He said softly, but with the familiar cold undertone. Pan turned her head away, not letting herself look at him in the face. She knew he'd see right through her. She started to sob, despite her efforts not to. She clenched her eyes shut, trying to block the memories. Vegeta shook her lightly.

"Brat, why did you hide such a thing?" he asked, even though he knew exactly why. He identified with her, but masked his understanding with an irritable tone.

Pan didn't answer, but began to cry openly.

"Damn it Vegeta! Let me go!" she protested angrily. It was then that Vegeta realized something, and the pieces of the jigsaw fell into place.

"That’s why, isn't it?" he growled. She said nothing and refused to look at his dark eyes.

"First that, then Trunks. No wonder you came to me for that." He said accusingly, trying to provoke a reaction.

He looked at her face searchingly. "What did he do to you?" he asked. Pan shivered.

"Vegeta…please…" she pleaded. Vegeta looked at her for a few more moments, taking in the way she trembled. Pan froze in shock when Vegeta enveloped her in his arms for a precious few seconds. He pulled away, and wiped a tear from her cheek.

"You're stronger than this." He said softly. "Even if you can't feel the strength right away, it’s inside of you. You'll see." He turned, and left her. She shivered, and began to change for the tournament, the words Vegeta had said repeating over and over in her head.

Pan pulled on her training boot slowly. She felt a presence behind her. She didn't say a word, she just kept her back to him.

"So, you're actually daring to show your face, are you?" Trunks sneered with disgust. Pan kept her mouth shut and looked at the floor. This angered Trunks, and he strode in front of her, and grabbed her shoulders. "You've got a lot of nerve after all that you did to us." He spat. He gazed down her top with a mixed expression. He slid his hands down and over her breasts. Pan winced, but didn't speak. "You must have had some good tricks to tear Dad away from my mother." Trunks whispered hoarsely in her ear. His hands slid back up to her shoulders, and pulled her top down to her waist. Pan didn't react but spoke as Trunks nibbled at her neck hungrily.

"Maybe he was just lonely." She said wistfully.

Trunks slapped her across the face. "You whore! He had Mom, he was happy!" He threw her back against the cold wall, and pressed himself against her. "I think I'll find out what made Dad choose you over Mom." He said spitefully. Pan didn't even try to fight him off. Trunks paused in his assault, and drew back to look at her. She looked at him, her eyes hollow, and her face emotionless.

"Is this what you want?" she whispered hauntingly. Pan stood against him and stared into his blue eyes. She lifted her arms up from her sides. "Go ahead. Do what you want with me." She said calmly in a defeated voice. "I don't care anymore."

Trunks was startled. Pan stood before him, her expression blank and detached. After a slight hesitation, Trunks turned around and left Pan there alone.

"And in the arena next, we have Son Pan." The announcer boomed. The gang looked up as Pan passed through the middle of them, her eyes focused on the arena. She stepped up onto the arena floor and the crowd cheered. She stood at her end, preparing herself for battle.

"And her opponent is none other than, Bad!" The audience roared and screamed. Pan looked up to face her opponent. The next few moments for her went incredibly slowly. As the man stepped into the arena, Pan’s face dropped in shock. He stood before her, his form silhouetted by the stadium lights. He grinned at her.

Pan stepped backwards. "No, no, no…" she repeated. The man stepped towards her.

"Isn't this a surprise? I guess it’s just fate." He sneered. "I knew you couldn't stay away from me that long." The others watched the battle with faint interest.

"Oh look, she’s scared." Trunks mocked, watching Pan’s fear of her opponent. Bad continued speaking.

"If you're that desperate, I could give you a repeat performance." He reached her and took a hold of her arms. "What do you say?"

Pan froze for a moment in terror, then her ki flashed, sending Bad flying across the arena.

The crowd Ooohed as the man struggled to his feet. "Since I'm here, and you're here, I say, why not make it a reunion?" he said, smirking.

Gohan stood up next to the stage. "What the hell’s going on?" he demanded, as his daughter cowered from the man.

"She’s terrified! Look at her!" Trunks laughed.

"You were a pro, really." Laughed Bad to Pan. "It would have made it more fun if you weren't so drugged up though." He finished mockingly.

Gohan stared in confusion. "What is he talking about?" he asked.

Vegeta scoffed at him. "Haven't you figured it out yet? Pan was raped." He informed them solemnly. They spun to face the shorter Saiyan.

"What?????" said Gohan in disbelief.

"The brat was raped, four years ago." Vegeta said, looking away.

"What…but she never…we never knew." Gohan stuttered.

Trunks was hit by a flashback;

Trunks stumbled backwards. "Damn!" he swore quietly to himself, clenching his fists with his eyes shut. "No wonder she acted like that." He said with a tinge of sorrow in his voice. She was so empty, so defeated. How many times had she been used, and he went and did a foolish thing like that? Vegeta noticed his son’s guilt, but now was not the time to question such things.

"Four years ago?" Bra stuttered. "That’s when…" She went quiet in shame.

Trunks spoke up. "That’s when I rejected her." He said quietly. Bulma put her arms around her son.

"Ssssssh…" she soothed. "You didn't know. None of us did…Oh Dende!"

Gohan clenched his fists in anger. "That’s why!" he said. "It all makes sense now. Why didn't she tell us????"

Vegeta kept his face turned away. "Pride. Her Saiyan pride." He said with an understanding empathy. "She’s more Saiyan in nature than she'll ever be human." He had known this for definite after the night he and Pan had shared.

Bulma nearly protested, but quieted, as she knew it was true. Pan and Vegeta had made a mistake, but in a way, it had been something that had to happen. Bulma accepted this silently.

Gohan looked at Vegeta with a reluctant, but mutual respect.

"We've got to help her." Gohan said suddenly, powering up. Vegeta took a glance at Pan’s situation. Bad had not yet attacked, she was safe, for now.

"I'm in." said Trunks, ashamed at the remarks he had said about Pan earlier. This time he would be there for her, he thought, raising his ki.

Bad stepped forward to Pan again. "Come on, what do you say?" he said again in a low tone. "It’s not like you're pure or anything. You're a slut."

Pan silently agreed with him. He’s right, I am a slut, she thought. I could have stopped him if I wanted to…I shouldn't have been flirting like that…

Gohan, Vegeta, Goten and Trunks landed beside Pan in the arena. The crowd cheered like crazy, only seeing a simple battle, with no conception at all of the seriousness of it.

Bad glanced in surprise. "Who are those guys? Your clients?" he mocked.

"You're going down!" Goten growled fiercely.

Pan stood straight up. "This is my fight!" she protested. Trunks lightly shoved her backwards, out of the way. Pan stumbled, but regained her posture. Her aura flashed angrily. "I'm doing this on my own." She said defiantly, flaring out her ki so they all went flying out of the arena.

They all landed on the ground. Gohan scrambled up. "Pan!" he yelled desperately.

Bad faced Pan again. "You sure do have a lot of power. Wanna put it to good use?" he said, winking at her.

Pan threw back her head and screamed louder than she had ever screamed before, clenching her fists tightly. She cried into the sky, all the pain, rage, sorrow, desertion, welling in the pit of her stomach. Tears openly flowed from her eyes, tears of desolation and abandonment. She screamed for all those who had ever hurt her, and taken advantage of her. Her aura exploded violently, flooding the arena with blinding light. She went straight through super Saiyan levels 1,2 and 3. A tail ripped through the back of her pants, her body sprouted red and black fur, and her hair lengthened, and returned coal black.

"HOW DARE YOU! WHAT GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO DO WHAT YOU DID TO ME?" she screamed blindly, in a desolate rage. She fell to her knees, overcome by the power and emotions. She looked up her opponent through tears.

"Look what you did to me…" she wept like a frightened child. "Why didn't you just kill me?"

The leader stepped forward with more confidence. "You loved every minute." He taunted viciously, with laughter in his dark eyes.

Pan stood up shakily.

"Do you want another ride?" He said seductively. Pan choked back the sobs with superhuman effort. She faced the man with a now emotionless expression.

Bad stepped towards her. "Come on baby. Come and get it."

Pan screamed with her new found power that made the stadium tremble underfoot.

"I WON'T LET ANYONE TOUCH ME LIKE THAT AGAIN!" she screamed as she fired the deadly white-hot attack at her opponent. He died instantly as the energy hit, and the stadium was filled with blood curdling cries. Pan stood on her own in the middle of the arena. Her physique trembled. She stood gazing at her destruction as hair whipped around her defeated face. "At least you're dead. You killed me, and I still have to live everyday in a conscious nightmare." Pan whispered quietly to the dead.

Her family and the gang of what used to be her friends landed next to her in the arena.

"Pan." said Gohan wistfully, stepping forward from the others to his daughter.

Pan looked at him with cold, red eyes. "I have no name." She said so icily that they shivered at the sound. They dared not approach the woman they used to know so well.

A small boy ran up to her, over the gray rubble of the arena. She looked down on the troubled young face. He reached out and grasped her hand in his smaller one.

"Mommy?" he said questioningly. She listened. "Did you finally get the bad man?" he said with a voice of innocence, untouched by the evil in the world.

Pan smiled and crouched to pick up the young boy in her protective embrace.

"Yes." She answered softly, brushing her hand through his coarse black hair, and smiling at his prominent widow’s peak. He laid his head on her shoulder contentedly, noticing the gang stood beside her.

"Who are all the people?" he asked with childlike curiosity. Pan took a glance at the faces of the people she used to love with all her heart.

"I don't know them." She said without emotion or remorse. She knew she didn't belong here anymore. She had a new life ahead of her. She had finally conquered the demons in her heart, and in time she would be ready to love again. She could never vanquish the darkness that lay buried there, that shook her in the night, but she could learn to carry on with her life. She had taken a life, and that was a burden she would have to carry. But for now, she had love to give, she thought as she held the young boy in her arms. She had someone who needed her. She had a reason to go on, and she was thankful for it.

They could only watch as the woman and her son took off into the crisp blue sky.